October 2006

I would just like to express my irritation with revolvers. The grips of revolvers are an absolute pain in the posterior to model. Why must people make things not easily expressible in terms of cylinders and cuboids? Or alternatively, when will I be able to create meshes and use those instead?

Ahem. Do excuse me. I am trying to make a model of the Smith and Wesson Russian Model revolver and am suffering.

I am currently reading a Fictional Periodical titled “The Glass Books of the Dream Eaters“, which I must say is a cracking read so far, with the fact that each new installment arrives through the post rather than one being able to read the whole thing at once adding to the suspense and the sense of occasion. A bold yet somewhat provincial heroine, an brutal yet sympathetic anti-hero, secret decadence at masked balls, a mysterious and threatening device draining or perhaps redefining the will… I am most certainly looking forward to further episodes.

Some of the names in question did give me a little pause, though. The assassin anti-hero is named Cardinal Chang. Cardinal, Ordinal, do you see? And Chang - (Desmond) Shang? It is all very curious.

I would certainly be pleased to advise Ms Temple on the issue of weaponry easily concealed about one’s person, which she would have most certainly benefitted from during her encounters in the first piece. Even given the necessity of changing clothing on several occasions, a HUD would remain undetected. Such things could never happen to a well-prepared lady in Second Life.

I was mentioned in the noted Aethernet Technological Journal, Wired! (See section Seven; they only mentioned the Slurlchatter, but the Slurlblogger is of course much better. I have sent a quick mail informing them of the existence of the device.)

Caledon 85,46,26 - Version 0.4 of the Slurlblogger is now available! As previously demonstrated by mice with hats, this version will now post directly to a blog as well as to email, and is notecard-configurable.

Caledon 87,47,26 - I have tested it with Blogger and Wordpress (on my own server), however, if anyone could confirm the stuff in the instruction card about other hosts and systems, that would be good. Typepad testing would be useful too. I’m sure I will be tweaking.

Caledon 87,47,26 - The following logo was not actually posted via the Slurlblogger, but after submitting this I will be adding it by hand….

(A further addendum: this is, please note, very much an experimental version, and may not work perfectly with everything. Please do not shout at me and knock off my glasses if it does not work with your system. There are a few issues, such as post titles perhaps not working outside of Wordpress, that I am looking at.)

Purchase from SLBoutique
Purchase from SLExchange

During the latest DownTime I have noticed that certain of my esteemed fellow residents seem to delight in posting the same complaints repeatedly across the forums. In actual fact the details of these complaints seem to vary little between events, and I imagine that it must be something of a strain to produce different prose each time.

With that in mind I have produced one of my Automated Tools for the convenience of anyone wishing to do so. Merely by visiting the Random Linden Lab Flame Generator, one may produce compositions such as

On top of everything else, we have to deal with closing the forums! I signed up so that I could sell inflatable penises - and I can’t!

Is this all some trick to get rid of us so you can sell SL to Microsoft? I put my kids through college by selling badly-made orbiters!

I’m a internet dietician and if I did this in my job I’d be fired! As a paying customer I don’t expect missing textures! This is the worst level of service I have ever seen. I pay for SL out of my hard-earned wages! YOU SUCK!!!

or

Being a Chicken Shack manager means that I know how things should be run - and this isn’t it! On top of everything else, we have to deal with freebie reselling! I’m a lawyer with twenty years experience and if any of my employees behaved like you do, I’d fire them! Why don’t we get more warning about W-Hat? I demand compensation!

for the delight of all readers. I know that I certainly appreciate reading such things. Any further suggestions for professions, issues, products or anything else will be gratefully received.

Whilst investigating the latest tram fiasco in Port Caledon, due to prim limits in the parcel just across the bridge (as usual), I endeavoured to show Zeppelin Duesberg (who was in attendance) that when one sits upon an object it does not fall foul of prim-limit-returnment.

Except that when I sat down on the tram, and waited for it to cross the bridge, I did fall foul of it. The tram was returned, I was plunged into limbo and forced to relog. This should absolutely not happen.

Heaven forfend that I ever be accused of being a complaining type, but when things do not operate as they are meant to, and make a fool of me when I am trying to demonstrate things, I become slightly irate.

Incidentally, please do not litter the public areas of Caledon with boxes, bicycles or bisected barnacles - it frequently obstructs the tram, and I am protective regarding the tram, and you would not wish me to have to hunt you down, really, would you?

I have been left somewhat drained of inspiration in Second Life recently by continual catastrophe and general malaise, and I have been thinking of alternative Models for Industry, as I am of course in constant need of funds, as are we all. Caledon is not free, you know.

Despite my general antipathy towards the production of custom builds, I was thinking that I might offer a service whereby a customer would suggest a specific model of firearm, and I would endeavour to create a replica. I have stated before that I find such things quite relaxing, though it can be quite a bit of work. I would wish to be able to sell the finished product to other customers afterwards, unless a great deal of money was forthcoming, but on the other hand, the purchaser would be able to say “it was I who gave Ordinal the idea for this device, it is special to me” - and they would receive a personally customised version which was not for general sale.

I would be obliged if any readers with Opinions would comment on the matter, and particularly as concerns the matter of price. I would be charging more than the standard for such a service, perhaps twice the subsequent sale price, or more for something that might not sell? It would depend on the difficulty of the thing.

Incidentally, yes, I have noticed the possibility of Restrictions regarding Scripting for certain Members of Society that have been proposed, and whilst I have been commenting on the matter on certain Aethernet Forums I consider that it would be somewhat premature to make a definitive statement, seeing as how the announcement was of such a speculative nature. Idle speculation is the Devil’s Playground. If firmer proposals are made I will certainly be making my feelings known. Incidentally it is interesting to see that the Linden “Blog” is at First Place in the rankings of its current publisher, wordpress.com. Apparently there are many curious residents out there demanding immediate information, and good luck to them, say I!

I feel that I should mention the contest being run by the publication Second Life Insider, where one might win a veritable cornucopia of delights. Or, at least, a limited subset of the produce of a cornucopia, as traditionally a cornucopia would keep on producing whatever was desired by its owner, and I fear that the designers in question here will not continue to make whatever it is the winner wishes on demand. I imagine that contacting Ms Aimee Weber for the fifth time in the middle of the night insisting that she make you a pair of furry kitten knickers immediately might not meet with a favourable response. So, in actual and prosaic fact, it is simply that there is an array of prizes to be claimed.

I mention this as I will be contributing a prize, and indeed, as stated on the entry concerned, it most definitely is a secret. I do not feel that I am giving much away, though, in saying that it may, perhaps, explode. Or it may not.

The list of entrants is at the moment rather short, shorter even than I, and thus I would advise readers to add their names and predictions. Ms Tateru Nino’s prediction, based on Proper Scientific Methods, has been made public, but of course the Millionth Resident could arrive at any time. No apocalyptic events have been foreseen to take place when this occurs, but given the nature of the Grid it might be advisable to hang on to whatever headgear you are currently wearing.

Yet again I manage to hibernate through another assault by Parties Unknown on the Grid; it is convenient for me that such things tend to occur during times of rest for me. Others have had some harrowing experiences, it seems:

The embankment next to the landing point in Rodeo is getting waterlogged and has started to slide in a few places. I was out in the muck, trying to clean off the landing stone and stabilize the hillside when an object whizzed by me. Then another. Pretty soon the air was full of them and I had to fight them off with the shovel to get away. Especially hard to do since they were trans. I ran to the south and then east into Stinson. I could hear one of them following me the whole way. I swung blindly a few times and managed to knocked it to the ground. Upon impact it became visible and split in two. I watched in frustration as it began to regenerate itself into two complete copies.

While they were making their repairs I ducked into the small cave in the southeast part of Stinson and made my way to the back wall. I didn’t have much time. I could hear the two prims powering up to full and knew they would detect me soon.

To be quite honest I have been absent for a while; I confess to being in one of my periods of ill-humour, and the only thing that I have been building recently is a Pneumatic Pistol, using a small steam engine to compress air that is then used to propel a projectile. The longer one builds up pressure, the more power the resulting shot possesses, but once full pressure is reached (indicated by a whistle) it must be released immediately, lest the Pistol suffer an overpressure explosion. But really, that is pretty much it, and even that experimentation has mostly has taken place a few hundred metres above the ground in one of my larger flying machines. Hey ho.

Sometimes I take a trip around Caledon when it is quiet, or fix the tram system, which has been irritating of late. When the Tram Rezzer vanishes, there is no Tram Rezzer Rezzer to replace it, and it would likely not work anyway as the original Rezzer only vanishes when the parcel becomes full, so any replacement would vanish shortly as well. One alternative would be different locations for trams to appear, each checking on each other, so that if Caledon II’s Rezzer suffers a mishap, trams begin at Caledon I or Port Caledon. Perhaps. (Have I said all this before? I am concerned that I begin to repeat myself with such stuff.)